“
My food is vegetarian, too!
”A beef meat lover
I Get My Kicks In Politics
Don't complain about corrupt politicians. Become one!
Thursday, 15 March 2012
Querida Operadora de Telefonía
Estimado Señor de mi Operadora de Telefonía
Tengo el placer de informarle, que Usted ha sido incluido en una promoción especial que sólo es válida para operadoras de telefonía con una calidad como la suya. A partir de ahora recibirá regularmente una carta-bomba y esto sólo por 999 euros al mes (IVA no incluido). El nuevo servicio ya está activado.
Entiendo que Usted quiere mantener este servicio si no se opone dentro de tres días hábiles. En el caso de que se quiera oponer, le rogamos que envíe un fax al número 607131863 indicando el CIF de su empresa, una copia de la licencia de telefonía, los números de teléfono a que Usted no quiere que se aplique el servicio y el motivo de la baja. Recibiendo su fax antes de dos meses del final de año, se procederá a darle la baja dentro de unos 24 a 48 meses.
Le ruego que compruebe el estado de la baja al final de este periodo llamando a mi atención de cliente, donde una máquina escuchará todas sus preguntas antes de colgarle.
Lamentablemente la comunicación por fax a veces no funciona por falta de papel, personal cualificado en la recepción de faxes o la comunicación del número de fax correcto. Por eso es a veces necesario de repetir el envío del fax de baja. Lo siento por esta inconveniencia y aviso que yo también uso el término “a veces” en el sentido de “a menudo”.
Atentamente
Un cliente suyo
Friday, 2 March 2012
Fairy Tales of 1001 Nights
Soon In Your Italien Court Of Justic:
Fairy Tales of 1001 Nights.
By Ex-Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi
- A lot of tales
- about a lot of nights
- with a lot of fairies
Wednesday, 22 February 2012
The Astronaut Quotes
A small step for a man, a great step for mankind.
That means, an astronaut has just entered a new realm alone.
A great step for a man, a small step for mankind.
That means, the astronaut has just entered a new realm with bride and priest.
Sunday, 19 February 2012
Watch For Free Or Pay For Nothing
Until now the movie producers only knew how to complain that we see movies without paying. Now it's enough. Now is pay-back-time. From now on we will only pay the movies, but without watching them and then let's see how much they like when we complain! Probably that is only fair taking into account the movies they try to sell us.
In a later step we will sue them for selling us movies for money without making sure that we actually see them. Internet sites like YouTube may only count videos as watched, when the user didn't click the page away before the video finished. Our lobby will support laws that will prevent producers from illegally selling movies that are never watched. At the third violation of that law, they will not be allowed to sell anymore. Neither movies and nor anything else. They will get their seller connection removed.
Interested? Join the Pay-For-Nothing-Movement!
Luckily enough, many companies already make their customers join without ever need to fill in any application form.
Saturday, 11 February 2012
Giving Is Holier Than Taking
“
Giving is holier than taking. For that reason I will give you my advice while not taking yours.
”Your stubborn friend
Friday, 10 February 2012
Americans and Italians: The Same Way to a Different Goal
Americans vote for Republicans, because they hope, once they will be rich, they don't need to feel bad about not paying taxes. That hope is not wrong. However 99% of Republican voters will never be rich enough to have an advantage of that.
Italians vote for Silvio Berlusconi, because they hope, once they will be rich, they don't need to feel bad about having twenty girl-friends under twenty. That hope is not wrong. However 99% of Berlusconi's voters will never be rich enough to have an advantage of that.
Thursday, 9 February 2012
A Man's Word for a Woman's Greatest Day
“
A great step for a man, a small step for mankind
”The groom
Sunday, 22 January 2012
Santa Claus' Aching Hand
People usually think, that Santa Claus is exhausted because of the millions of gifts he has to deliver to the children of the world. But this is only one part of his job.
The other is beating thousands of naughty children butts.
And with the same hand, Santa Claus still has to carry his heavy gift sack. Poor man!
Sunday, 15 January 2012
Sport is Healthy
Being an acitve person is the best way to live longer.
Here an extract from the exciting biography of somebody taking care of nutrition and sport
2002: Bicycle accident, broken leg
2004: Foot in gipsum after an impressive jump while playing basketball
2005: Amputate a finger with the rope while mountain climbing
2007: Freeze two toes of the left foot on a trekking tour
2008: Knee surgery after ski accident
2010: Ugly desease after getting biten by an unknown insect during a forest walk.
2011: Help moving an heavily overweighted person from the sofa where he died of heart attack. A broken back bone causes to spend the rest of the life in a wheel chair.
End of 2011: One wheel of the wheel chair comes too close to the sidewalk edge. Fall sidewards on the street; just in front of a truck passing by. Most important bones broken, several vital organs squeezed. Die a painful death somewhere in a hospital - but with a healthy heart and ideal weight.
At contrast the boring biography of a couch potato.
19XX - 2011: Sit on a comfortable sofa watching television while eating junk food and drinking cola
2011: Heart attack
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